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We recently interviewed Avril Louise Clarke, aka @sexologygirl. Avril is a Clinical Sexologist, the Intimacy coordinator behind @erikalustfilms, and manages the non-profit project @thepconversation.

 

Could you tell us a bit about yourself and your place in the sexology world?

I am a clinical sexologist, meaning I wear different hats in the world of sexology. I mainly work in education, managing the non-profit project The Porn Conversation. I developed all the educational materials for it and keep it running through it's expansion into other languages and our growing ambassador and university student ambassador program. I am a porn literacy educator and work within the adult film industry as an intimacy coordinator on set. Meaning, I work alongside production teams to create and promote a culture of consent on adult film sets.

 

What is an intimacy coordinator?

An intimacy coordinator is a position that grew out of the #metoo movement. It was and continues to still be used in Hollywood film sets and also growing internationally to create a safer set environment for all performers. In the adult industry, it works a bit different though than in Hollywood. Where in mainstream series you see people mimicking sex, performers in the adult industry are actually having sex. So this means not only do consent and boundary talks still happen, but STI testing and sexual wellness also play a huge role, which an intimacy coordinator will assist with.

 

How did you find this professional path?

I was always interested and curious about talking about sex. In high school, my friends and I realized we were never going to get the sex education we deserved, so we created the HIV AIDS Awareness Club, which brought in sex educators and sexologistss. We took it into our own hands to learn and create sex-positive educational spaces when adults just weren't doing it for us! This started a growing interest in this field that stuck with me for a lifetime. 15+ years later I am here as a clinical sexologist doing the work I love.

 

Did you grow up in a sex-positive environment? 

I grew up in an Irish Catholic household, sex was never up for discussion and I wasn't given any advice when it even came to puberty (periods, body hair, etc.). It was just not something we spoke about. Besides what I learned from friends, from the internet and from the sex educators we brought to our school through the HIV AIDS Awareness Club, I was able to "figure things out" for the most part. But there was a huge lack of formal guidance, especially when it came to consent. I felt lost a lot in my life. I felt really affected by what I saw in porn and what others taught me from what they saw in porn. It's a big reason why I am doing what I do. Hoping that the next generation can learn how to be more in control and aware - more than me and my peers were. What is sex-positive sex ed for? Simply put: It's pleasure-based, it's factual, it's inclusive. It's all about promoting the kind of sex ed everybody and every identity deserves.

 

Most young people educate themselves from porn. Do you think this is problematic?

It certainly can be. I mean, it's pretty unavoidable. Young people are curious, and going to the internet to find answers when there is a lack of sex-positive and comprehensive sex education available to you is expected. Unfortunately, in most cases what shows up is free online porn. Without the knowledge of porn literacy, being able to decipher one's own meaning from the content they are seeing, this can be shocking and can affect the way one approaches sex and their understanding of respectful relationships. Porn is adult entertainment, not sex education.

 

How can porn be a good source of sex ed?

Some can be, however for people under 18, they deserve proper sex education. It can be conflicting to just grab the messages one sees in porn and call it educational. Some of it can be quite harmful, from the expectations of sex, to safer sexual practices, to the racism and misogyny we often see in the categories, titles and content in porn. For adults, there are more educational porn videos out there on ethical porn sites. It truly walks you through various topics like managing erectile function in the bedroom to guides on how to squirt. There is a lot of great educational stuff out there in ethically produced porn.

 

What is Quycky sex advice to those who wish to become more sex positive?

Don't yuck others' yums. Just because you're not into it, doesn't make it "bad". It also doesn't mean you need to do something you aren't comfortable with. Get comfy with saying and hearing "no" in the bedroom. Sexuality and our expression of it exists on a spectrum.